I want to make a zoo with you.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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