I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
