I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
