no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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