you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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