her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
