Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize