you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
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She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
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The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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