I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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