Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize