When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Green mimosas i think yes
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
