I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
