His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
