You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I don't deserve a penis
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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