drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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