Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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