Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
No subtext here. People are naked.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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