I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize