Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize