I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize