Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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