i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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