google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
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