; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You are the jesus of drinking
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid