If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
