Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
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If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
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If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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