Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Randomize
