All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
