I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
