I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
my liver is dry heaving
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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