I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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