i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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