Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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