i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
