remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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