Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize