Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
