I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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