READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
