DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I'm getting married
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex