I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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