My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize