Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize