True but thats because hes a fetus.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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