YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize