i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
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He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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