I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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