She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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