if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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