i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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